Feelings Are Overrated

Have you ever felt that you are living life but there is something missing? It’s not like you are sad or depressed, it’s like something is missing. I feel somewhat like that.

I am Anirban from India and I want to do big things. I am crazy and I like to think. The reason for this blog post is to talk you about phases in life when things feel different even though everything is alright.

Feelings are said to be overrated and I agree. But they are important indicators of what we are doing wrong. And I am a big believer in self-reflection. And I think feelings can help us introspect more effectively.

But I also believe feelings must not come in decision making. I myself fail to live by this idea but I that if I had not listened to my feelings, my life would have been completely different for good. I mean I would not have been able to recognize myself in the mirror.

When I say that I mean feelings play a major role in maintaining a false sense of self. And although it is not true for all situations, I think it is true for more situations.

And that’s why I think the dicotomy between purpose and survival is very confusing. Purpose tends to be emotional and survival tends to be more logical. When I want to make a decision based on thinking through something, I make the mistake of not taking action fast. I mean I tend to ask myself “What’s the purpose behind that?” and then when I start taking action, I am forced by my habits to change my mind to the survival mindset.

I am not perfect and I am trying to figure things out. The easiest way out seems to be just take action. But it’s not easy. As a leader it is important to have fierce belief and a sense of direction but it is not easy to do that when you have collegen and people over your head instructing you to live life their way.

I mean it not easy but I must stay focused.

Right now something feels like it’s missing. Maybe it’s just the mind but I have to take responsibility of that. At the end of the day I am the one who created my life’s circumstances.

I think the thing I want to give to you in this post is that Responsibility is what we must take for everything. Even if it is negative emotions or confusion or other people’s actions, we must take responsibility.

I think you liked this post and if you did not know already, I am Anirban from India, I have an ecommerce business and I am living life for connection to self and others.

Please like, share and follow me!

Habits : How To Start And Maintain A Habit?

This post is about habits. I think I have an insight into habits and I would like to share it with you.

I started meditation 3 years ago and I meditated daily for a year. And it totally fixed my videogame bad habit. And although I am not meditating on a regular basis today, I think that that habit of meditation made me more disciplined.

Right now I have the habit of reading for 2 hours daily. But this habit was made possible by me setting a commitment to read.

I also have the habit of following a routine everyday. And that is something that helps me feel secure and stable about my day.

Habits make our day easier. I mean even though reading everyday for a fixed amount of time is not easy but it is easy enough to do it everyday if I set a specific time and period for it.

So here’s what I face problems in habits. I think that it is tempting to think that I can read for 4-5 hours a day and then when I do it, I am unable to see consistent results.

Results like learning something new must be done consistently. I mean it is better to read 1 hour for 10 days than read 4 hours in one day and not read the rest of the 9 days.

So I would say start with a fixed period and condition. What I mean is- tell yourself that I will not do this until I do that. So if you want to meditate daily, do an agreement with yourself to not eat breakfast until you meditated for 20 minutes.

But if you missed it, then maybe you can do it later. But aim for that consistency.

Then just do it consistently using a routine. I recommend re-writing the routine again with specific actions.

So this is my insight on habits and how to start and maintain it. If you like this post, then hit the like button and subscribe to my blog. And as always stay awesome.

Karma Yoga: A Real 10X Guide

Karma Yoga is a way to liberation through living life as a householder. Karma means action and Yoga means union. But very few know how it works. It is easy to accept that Karma Yoga is a way to liberation. It is difficult to keep your mind focused on the real goal- Truth. So I want to share with you my ideas about Karma Yoga.

Most of us had a moment in life when we inquired about truth and the meaning of life. And our friends and family members told us that we know truth only through life’s experiences. Well, it is easy to say that but that is the most difficult thing to do among all other spiritual ways.

Karma Yoga aims at “do your duty and stay detached from the expectations of the fruits of our actions”. But are we doing it?

See most of us start with that goal in mind but soon forget about it. I will show you how you can be on your way to truth back again and have a solid foundation of doing Karma Yoga.

These are some things that you must follow to do Karma Yoga-

1. Truth is the goal- Remember that your life’s goal is the truth. You live for truth and you die for the truth. But you must have a desire and obsession for the truth greater than your desire for anything else. You must be able to say yes to losing everything to know the truth. Admit it.

2. Be clear about you “duty” and commit- In Karma Yoga, we see duty as the holy grail of decisions. So you must be very clear on what your duty or means of attaining truth is. For example, you run your business and you like to help people. Then your duty is to help people through your business to know the truth. And then you must commit to your duty.

3. 10X Everything*– Set 10X the goals required and act 10X the actions required. Do this with anything you want to get. This is because this frees you from the scarcity and survival mindset. It connects you to a higher purpose.

4. Be self-aware- Always see if you did anything wrong. Keep the ego away. Humility is the enemy of ego. Always try to be self-aware and notice your fault instead of point out anyone else’s faults.

5. Be of service- Serve humanity more than you serve God. Swami Vivekananda said, “Where can we go to find God if we cannot see him in our own hearts and in every living being.”

Although this is not simple to put in action, I try to do my best to do it. I have learnt a great deal about myself and my self-awareness has also increased a lot. If you follow the points I said then you will also be able to raise your awareness.

*A quick note: 10X means 10 times to goals and 10 times the actions and hard work. This will ensure that you aim for the stars and land on the moon. More on this on another blog post.

A few things keep in mind would be-

1. Do not let your ego control your decisions- Ego will put you off track and stop you from knowing the truth. Whenever you see anything egotistical about yourself, ground yourself in self-awareness.

2. Do not let illusions of self-awareness fool you- We cannot measure self-awareness. Our inner peace, integrity, compassion and humility indicates our self-awareness levels.

3. Do not neglect success- Success and money are important. In his book Karma Yoga, Swami Vivekananda said that you must make it your duty to provide for your family. Without that you are nothing. So you must make your duty clear and pursue success instead of thinking you can rest.

4. Do 10X your duty and make others happy- Do extra service, extra help, be extra energetic and live life to the fullest. Truth is not serious, it is very simple and loving.

So this is what I have to say about Karma Yoga.

Swami Vivekananda said,”He is an atheist who does not believe in himself. The old religions said that he was an atheist who did not believe in God. The new religion says that he is an atheist who does not believe in himself.”

So believe in yourself. This is also because the truth is in who you are. In spirituality, they ask “who am I?” So your authentic self is the answer.

Please comment on did you like it and if not why? Share it with your friends and family members. And subscribe to my website anirbansaren.com for updates and my free journal ebook. My youtube channel is Anirban Saren. Get more similar content here.

Beliefs: Degree and Scale

We all have polarized opinions that something or someone is good or evil. But most of the time those are not completely accurate. When we realize the truth then there is a lot of grey area. There are degrees of good/bad and different scales depending on the context of the matter.

It is not easy to always see the grey area. It is a sign of a mature mind who can understand the wisdom behind everyday phenomena. And if a person knows how to see the grey and still make good decisions in life, we may know him as a great leader in the future.

What is a grey area?

It is an understanding that people or things are not completely good or evil or both. They are as they are and their impact in our lives both comes with “good” and “bad” consequences. For example, if we try to know the truth about whether “people are bad”. It is sometimes true and sometimes not. There is no universal version of it for all people in all circumstances. Let’s reframe it. We begin with defining what “people” means here. Of course, it depends on the person saying the statement. To me, “people” may mean people at night clubs because I spend most of the time there with a job I hate. But to my friend Kabir, “people” may mean people at his office and his boss because he hates his job. So for everyone “people” has a different meaning. To me, people at night clubs may be bad and to Kabir people at his office are bad. So we cannot make it into a universal truth for all humans in the world.

Now the concept of degree and scale is like rows and columns in a table. Every value at different combinations of the two has a different value. It is like the Celsius degree of 37 degrees. 37 degrees in Celsius is not the same as 37 degrees in Fahrenheit. For example, a person with low emotional intelligence(EQ) has a problem with people at night clubs. Then the low EQ is the degree and the context of nigh clubs is the scale.

“Why are you trying to tell me this simple stuff in this complicated manner, Anirban?”, you may be thinking. This system will improve your understanding of your beliefs, decisions and life.

How do I use the grey area concept for challenging my false beliefs?

Your beliefs are something you hold as the truth. But we base most of them on misperception or partial perception. For example, you experienced bullying in school for being a certain way. That’s why you are holding a belief that people will bully you if you are that way and you believe that “people are bad”. But that is not the truth. What you can do is to use the grey area concept for solving this problem.

You do this by reframing and putting things in its proper context. The degree and scale model makes it easier to do that. All you have to do is-

Degree: the thinking of as if people will bully you.

Scale: the context of your limited perspective of the feeling of threat from people.

Then you can change your beliefs with appropriate actions. I will discuss that in another blog post.

How can I distinguish degree from the scale?

It is very simple to do so.

Degree- You can ask yourself “To what degree is the statement true?” and then the answer that you get is the degree.

Scale- You can ask yourself, “At what scale is the statement true?” and then the answer that you get is the scale.

This is a new system that I came up with. I hope you will find it helpful.

Please comment on what results you got from this system and did you understand and like it? Also share this blog post with all your friends and family members or anyone who will find it useful.

Playing : The Great Attitude

This is the most underestimated action that people neglect. Playing is not just for kids but for everyone.

It is good for the mind and the body and it is something we all can do. Unlike meditation, you are doing what you can enjoy without putting too much effort. It’s about doing what you love to do in a playful manner, without self-judge, expectations or stress. It’s about playing like a kid. What this will do is increase your creativity. And reduce stress.

This is what we want through relaxation and listening to music. But we often over-indulge in these activities because we don’t feel playful. What we want is not relaxation but play and to make mistakes and that others and we don’t judge us.

In work, in school, we are thinking and judging ourselves and we are afraid to make mistakes. It will help if we start to have a few minutes of playfulness in our lives. It’s not about exercise but about surrendering the ego for a few moments.

It is important to make time for play. For example, one can-

  1. go to meetups and talk to like-minded people,
  2. play in the playground for fun,
  3. have fun with a hobby,
  4. contributing to online forums by helping others with similar problems,
  5. research for the sake of knowledge,
  6. read something outside his industry, etc.

Whether this will create a material gain for you I can’t guarantee but I can guarantee it will make you happy and reduce your stress and ego. You don’t have to beat yourself up for having an ego, you can play every day and do it.

If you like this post, please comment why do you like this post on playing and what can you do to create a playful environment and attitude? And share this post with your friends and family members and anyone who you know will enjoy this blog post.