The Only Real Reason To Live Life For

I wanted to speak about something more philosophical but I realised I am here to be authentic. And here’s a topic that’s authentic to me but also very important to understand. (None of what I wrote is scientifically verified. I am writing what I feel from my point of view.)

The real reason that we need to live for is our capacity to love unconditionally.

I am not referring to the romantic love we seek while searching for a girlfriend or a boyfriend. I am talking about the love that Mother Theresa showed, that Martin Luther King Jr. showed, that Abraham Lincoln showed, that Lord Jesus shows, that makes you inspired on a Saturday night when you decide to change your career because you realise that your entire life is of a sheep living life just to fit in and not living an authentic life.

I find the latest trendy goal setting self-help materials very funny because they want you to create artificial motivations based on money, health, wealth, love, happiness and other temporary things. I say “temporary” because they don’t matter in the long run. They are important but they don’t matter.

What matters is increasing your capacity to love unconditionally. What does this even mean? I am glad you asked. In my experience, I realised that something is love when you want to water it and grow it instead of plucking it like a flower. For example, parents love their children but not all parents love other people’s children like their own children. When they can love other people like they love their own children, I think that is unconditional love.

I know there will be disagreements in some people and it’s alright. Please comment it under this blog post and I will try to reply.

Now not all people are parents. So you must understand that what I mean by the above example is when you can love another being as if he were you, then that is unconditional love.

Empathy is a very important feeling here and it will help you love unconditionally. Self-love is also a very important quality because without it there is no love. Helping others, living your life purpose, being happy, cherishing the little things in life are very important for unconditional love. Also there are many qualities that go into helping you grow your capacity to love unconditionally. Therefore if you want to grow your capacity to love unconditionally, you need to study unconditional love and start growing it through applying what you studied.

Now let me tell you what I think are its benefits-

  1. True happiness
  2. Satisfaction
  3. Feeling like you are doing things that matter(the little things)
  4. True success
  5. Freedom from the mind’s self-created suffering
  6. Wisdom
  7. Connection to God
  8. And many more benefits.

This list is created by me because I feel that in my experience unconditional love has there benefits and more.

So what I want to communicate to you through this blog post is that instead of basing your goals in money or other temporary things, you could base your goals in your capacity to love unconditionally. For example it you think on a scale of 1 to 10 you are 2 at helping animals, then how can you make it a 4 in the next 6 months? Or if you are a 5 at helping people in your workplace, then what will it take to make it a 7?

If you don’t want to replace your money goals then you could at least add unconditional love to the top and money to the second position. Because unconditional love is what matters.

Thank you for reading this blog post. I am writing after a long time and I believe I need to apologise. So I apologise to you all who reads my blog and follows it. I have been busy and distracted for a while and I would love to be back to blogging regularly again. Thanks again for reading and please like and share this blog post. Take care!

3 Interesting Requirements Of Self-improvement

What could I possibly gain from personal development? Why is it considered so important? It sounds like I will be made to read lots of books and act in a robotic manner.

This is not the truth. What I used to think about self-improvement is something that is the shallow self-improvement tips that we read in new blogs. The truth is much deeper.

Self-improvement is a practice where one becomes aware of his/her shortcomings and changes then at deep consciousness levels. It is one of the most difficult things to do.

Self-improvement is the only way to take control of your life. We know that the only thing we can control in life is how we respond to life’s situations, we are a product of our life’s decisions. So we can control only our lives and our choices.

How can self-improvement help you? First of all reading books is important for self-improvement. Second, practice is mandatory. And getting results should be seen as the measuring factor for self-improvement.

  • Reading is important. It is something that we all have learnt. Since most self-help books are written in English it is sometimes hard to read them for anyone who is comfortable in other languages. But until those books are translated or a big tech giant like Microsoft invests a book translation device, we have to compromise.
  • Practising the things we learn in those books are very important. This will keep us grounded in reality and let us use the information in those books more effectively. For example, the book Think and Grow Rich talks about burning desire to get success, but if one does not practice them in life, then one will not be able to get what one wants.
  • Getting results or winning is the goal of self-improve. No? Beware of anyone who tells you that self-improvement is a hobby. It is not. It is a duty and an obligation for achieving results that matter. For this we need to repeatedly ask ourselves – Did I get results? Did I achieve results that matter?

Without these three things self-improvement is not self-improvement, it becomes a delusion. Although most people want to earn money and live a comfortable life, you can choose to live a life more meaningful than money and comfort. So choose and choose fast.

Please comment – Do you agree with the three points that I mentioned about self-improvement? and share this with your friends and family members and anyone who you know will benefit from this information. And lastly subscribe to my youtube channel youtube.com/c/AnirbanSaren and also sign up to my mailing list.

Facing Fear

Fear is the most paralyzing emotion of the human experience. It is disarming and it kills confidence. And although facing fear is one of the hardest things that anyone can do, it is something that we must do.

In the Bhagavad Gita, Arjuna had to face his fear and Krishna help him through the process. Although it seems as if it was self-knowledge that helped Arjuna overcome fear, the truth is that facing the fear head-on is the only thing that can help anyone overcome that paralyzing emotion. I am not trying to prove any mythological story wrong, but I am saying that facing fear is the most important thing that a person can do.

Although it is not something that everyone is born equipped to overcome fear, just doing something even if there is cognitive dissonance in the person’s mind or simply doubts is hard. It takes a combination of self-knowledge/self-awareness and faith to overcome fear.

Although they seem like two different things, self-awareness and faith are connected. Without self-awareness, faith cannot last long and vice-versa. And any attempt to increase self-awareness without faith or faith without self-awareness will not prove to be useful.

Most people avoid fear and it is the most natural thing to do given our evolutionary instincts. Increasing one’s self-knowledge/self-awareness can help one to become more resilient to fear. Since we have a reptilian part of the brain which works on the fight or flight response, we need to practice our willpower muscle and that is something we need to do and it’s not something that happens naturally.

The only thing that keeps us from greatness is fear. If we start committing to something and working the commitment, we increase our will power and our ability to face fear. This is critical to our success as a species. Even if it means starting a new good habit or journaling, it is going to be fruitful and worth it.

The greatest investment that will give you a 100% ROI (Return on Investment) is an investment in your learning and your capacity to act. Theory and practice of self-awareness and faith are important for overcoming fear. But this is also not an excuse to keep yourself busy if you already have the ability to overcome fear.

So please comment on what areas of your life are you most fearful about and share this post with your friends and family members. Lastly, check out my youtube channel youtube.com/c/AnirbanSaren to learn more about this topic.

Learning: The Most Important Commitment To Make Today

Learning as a commitment

Learning is a lifelong pursuit. It is the most important commitment you can make.

Learning- the acquisition of knowledge or skills through study, experience, or being taught.

When I write about a lifelong commitment then I mean until your last day you must commit to learning something new about your trade and about life. Actively doing it and participating in it are mandatory.

Changing your life through learning

This is about learning about your trade and life which is what most people avoid and don’t consider necessary but if done honestly and sincerely can increase your income and change your life.

This is also about what matters to you and your purpose in life. And if you can discover your purpose in life, that solves so many problems.  Your purpose in life can be discovered by learning.

It is the only thing that will ensure that you will be secure in the present and the future. It is the lowest risk investment and gives permanent lifelong benefits.

How does it secure your future? By giving you the knowledge and skills to get your way in life. Imagine a nuclear apocalypse takes place in your country and there are no jobs. The only thing that will ensure that you succeed, is your ability to get the job done, your skills. You must take time to hone your skills and master your trade.

It is not a selfish pursuit. You are learning because you are a conscious human being. Not expanding through it and growing is a disservice to your company, your family and yourself.

Always assume that if you are not getting the results in your life, then there is something that you don’t know. And the solution is to learn it.

Jay Shetty talks about growth in his podcast and I totally agree that learning is the number one activity that will ensure your success. Without it nothing, nothing will get better.

Conclusion

Although most people say that to get rich you need to invest money or start a business, I would say that learning is the best investment and it is required for business too. So it will be instrumental to your success and also to your life.

So please comment Wil you commit to learning? Share this blog post with your friends and family and also like our youtube channel Anirban Saren ( youtube.com/c/AnirbanSaren ).

How To Increase Self-esteem?

Introduction

The book “The Six Pillars of Self-esteem” is a very good one but I don’t think it’s enough. So I am writing this blog post to explain why it is not enough and how we can solve the problem of low self-esteem.

So the reason why the book is not enough is that it focuses too much on written exercise and talks about the importance of self-esteem but does not give a clear reason why you must work on your self-esteem. Also, the fact that the book is about self-esteem is not appropriate for someone who thinks they need to increase their self-esteem because in reality focusing on self-esteem only creates frustration. Instead, the focus should be to change the thoughts and actions of the individual concerned.

For example, if I want to increase my self-esteem but I just do the exercises and go on living life the way that I used to lead my life, then I will not see any remarkable change in my life because the attempt to increase self-esteem was very superficial. It was not enough to create a shift in the person’s mindset and actions. A more powerful approach to achieve the same goal could be to give ways to increase the productivity level of the individual which will increase the individual’s confidence.

I would like to use Grant Cardone’s philosophy of the 10X Rule which is a book written by him. He says “This is the focus of the 10X Rule: You must set targets that are 10 times what you think you want and then do 10 times what you think it will take to accomplish those targets. Massive thoughts must be followed by massive actions.” Now, this is a very radical concept. It’s about 10 times everything. And it is something I realized that we all are using unconsciously in our lives. Every time someone achieves some success, the reason behind that success is that he/she had put 10 times the effort with 10 times the thinking into what he/she wanted. This is very relevant to self-esteem because unless you follow the 10X Rule, you can’t get true self-esteem or confidence in yourself for the long term.

Ways to Increase Self-esteem

  1. Take time to have fun and enjoy life
  2. Get honest with yourself
  3. Act at 10 times greater
  4. Think at 10 times higher
  5. Succeed

My favourite steps to increase self-esteem are:

  1. Take time to have fun and enjoy life

    Life is a playground where the rules change as we progress. But regardless of the rules, it’s still a playground where we need to have fun to be happy. You can call it self-expression, success, love, passion, etc. but still it is something we need to have fun with. Without having fun, there is no point in success. Without happiness, there is no meaning in life. And also there is no self-esteem without happiness, playing and having fun.

    I remember whenever I feel a lack of self-esteem I would do something that I was passionate about and that I had fun doing. And I know it works because it works every time for me.

  2. Get Honest with Yourself

    This is the most important part of the process or way to increase self-esteem. If you are not honest about where you are in life and what you are doing now, then you can’t get what you want. Getting honest with yourself is very important because if you are clear about your life’s facts then you plan and start acting towards achieving your goals. This builds huge self-esteem in you and gives you the clarity to ignore the distractions and impermanence of life.

  3. Act at 10 times greater

    This is important if you are following your dreams but are not motivated and emotional stress. If you just apply this mindset in practice then you can ensure your success in what you are trying to achieve anything in life. Why I say this is because as Tony Robbins tweeted on 25th October 2016,”Most people overestimate what they can do in a year and they underestimate what they can do in two or three decades.” I absolutely agree with this and I am sure you would agree too.
    Just think about it, if you think you can double your income in 1 year, you may feel excited and even motivated. But if we ask you to project your growth in the next 5 years then like most of us you may not be able to come up with a solid number. It’s just not the way we are taught to think in society.

    Acting at quantities that are 10 times will increase self-esteem. Because it is through action that you can experiment with life and get feedback about what works for you.

  4. Think at 10 times higher

    If acting at 10 times the level you think is required is tails in a coin, then the heads is thinking at 10 times the level you think is required. Why is it so? Now I will ask you to do a thought experiment with me. What if I succeed at earning double my income? What will happen? How would I feel? For me, I will feel temporarily happier but then everything goes back to “normal”. Why is that? It’s because of the goal that I had was reasonable and attainable. Hold on. Are we not supposed to set attainable goals? The answer is NO.

    As Grant Cardone says that you must set unreasonable and huge goals. And he also gives the steps to how to achieve them but we will discuss that in a later blog post. For now, let me explain to you why is that so. When you set reasonable and attainable goals then you set yourself up for a meaningless success. It’s not about the external objective success. It’s about growth and meaning. We don’t generally find meaning in getting paid double. I bet you can’t go on succeeding with setting attainable goals because the meaning is missing. Now if you aim for a number or a cause that is beyond your own needs then you are fueled by purpose and meaning. When you attain that goal or even if you fail to attain it, you will still feel much better than when you had achieved the previous attainable goal.

    Just imagine if you have a goal that is not meaningful and if you achieved it, will it increase your self-esteem?

  5. Succeed

    This is important. If you are failing and not growing, then honestly you are deceiving yourself. Although failing teaches us many things, success teaches us more. Personally failing did not teach me much but success taught me a lot. If you follow all the other steps but are not succeeding, then you need to really introspect and start learning, experimenting, performing, struggling and thriving, as said by Jay Shetty in one of his podcasts The 5 levels of growth that you can’t skip.

    Although success is different for everyone, it is not something you lie to yourself about. If you do lie then it will inevitably affect your self-esteem in a negative manner.

Conclusion

This is my ways to increase self-esteem, my dear reader. These ways don’t work unless you do as said by a great person. Self-esteem is not something that is an option, it is a need. It is something that you cannot skip and you must realize your self-worth through these ways in order to increase self-esteem.

So please tell me what would you do if you don’t feel confident and lack self-esteem. Share this post with your friends and family members and help them increase their self-esteem.